Next Step

September, 21st 2014
10:06


     I just realized that I was too sappy in the previous post, lmao.
I could become so alay when I feel too emotional, but the imagination gone wild when I do, that's one positive thing about being emotional.

     'Woman always put their emotion first before their logic' couldn't agree more.

     Ah, it's not something about being emotional I want to talk about.
I woke up at 8 in the morning today and I felt like writing the moment I woke up. But I dont know what to say.
Last night, I thought of many things. I always being so thoughtful at midnight. The imagination runs smoothly and passionate. I wanted to write my thoughts here but mom didnt let me to stay up late, so I got to sleep early. And in the morning I forgot everything I want to write.
I'm screwed up once again.

     In the previous post I talked about how I really want my crush to know about my feeling. But things didnt go very well. Everything becomes stiff. passive. He's such a turn off all of a sudden. And we stop talk just like that. Like nothing ever happened between us (It's not like something had happened tho). It's just we were close back then. He was one of my closest coursemate. Even tho it didn't pass a month yet. I never get along with others very well. But he was being so nice to me. I was so thankful.

     But I took his kindness in another way. The next day I found that I put too much hope on him. That he could make become a cheerful one with pure feeling called love once again. That he could make me feel that someone actually want to take care of me. That he could make me forgot my past. Those damn feelings. They ruined everything. I shouldn't have liked him. We should've stayed in a circle of friends. We should've been a very good friends now ;)))))))))))

     We should have been..

     Since everything already messed up, and maybe I'm the only one who think a lot about this, let's do one last step when something didnt work well between you and your crush.

     Move on.

     히얏!!!!!!!!!

     Well, I meet him everyday. And I just don't want to suffering in the class until the next two months just because of him my feeling. So I should really forget about my feeling and let's make it up with him. Be friends again like we used to. But I know it's not an easy task. Given that I'm kinda unsure about start a convo with him. He's kinda scary tho (aha). I'm afraid that he won't respond so nice if I talk to him. And this maudlin heart will feel offended again.
I hate being easily feel offended. It makes me scared of everything.

     Ha..

     It was a short beautiful moment tho. I won't forget. But let's not keep it too deep in heart :)

     And I'll make sure that I won't be flustered anymore.

     우리 친구하자..